Picture your child at age 25. Mother with that end in mind today.
When I think of my kids as adults, there are several adjectives that come to mind.
I am often feeling scared that my kids will not turn out the way I want them to. But then I have to remember that they are only 7 and 4, and there is plenty of time. And then I take an even closer look and realize that they are wonderful children. When I worry, I need to remember that they are kids being kids.
Last night, Cooper was going crazy with a bat and a hockey stick – swinging them around, hitting himself with them, just being crazy. (And of course, this was all happening while trying to Skype with Nana and Papa!) I told him to settle down and that I was worried he would hurt himself. Jeremy had to remind me that he is a boy. He has a penis, and therefore that penis will lead him to do stupid and crazy stuff. Is this really what I have to keep telling myself?
And then with Mason, she gets so emotional and often selfish, and I’m so worried of where that will take her in her teenage and young adult years. But the reality is that I was the same way. And I think I’m a pretty decent adult, so there is hope. I just need to be patient.
So to “mother” with the intent of having my kids grow into the adjectives I listed above, I need to be patient. But mostly I need to model those behaviors. They watch us so intently, and so as parents, we need to be the role models of those adjectives. It’s not always easy, but it will definitely be worth it in the end when we can see what wonderful young adults they have become!