I went on a first date today. It was just for lunch, and I think it went pretty well. I hope she calls me again.
Ok, yes, it was a Mommy Date. And yes, I was nervous about it. I don’t go on too many Mommy Dates. All during the lunch and right after, I kept analyzing what I was saying and what I was doing. Did I look awkward with my hand under my chin? Why did I order a salad – maybe now I have lettuce in my teeth. Would she tell me if I had lettuce in my teeth? I don’t think we’re that close yet. Why did I talk about how much I love shopping? Does she now think I’m a prissy little shoes and clothes hoarder? Did I ask enough questions about her? Did I talk too much? Did I talk enough? Do we have enough in common? I wonder if she likes chic flicks?
It’s sad that this is the state of my dating life right now. But finding friends at my age is hard. I feel like I have a great group of friends already. The problem is that they live all over the place. I need friends close by. I need friends that I can go for a walk with or who can pick up my kids from school in a bind. I need friends on the sidelines of the soccer field. I need friends at the PTA meetings and Daisy meetings. The date today wasn’t all about need, though. I actually wanted to get to know her better. She seems really cool… the whole family is pretty cool actually. And she’s the mom of Mason’s best friend, so it would be good to get to know her more as we embark on the sleepover days and after school playdates.
It’s amazing how much influence your kids have on who you are friends with. At kindergarten orientation back in August, I saw many moms that looked like people I would want to get to know. But if Mason’s not friends with their kids or they have a son or their daughter is in another class, then I don’t get to know them. And while I know that her class and friends may change over the years, it is these initial relationships that take hold, which is why I already feel so behind. Many of the moms I see are already good friends either from older siblings or because they live on the same street. I don’t know anyone on our street that has a kindergartener or a kid Cooper’s age. That is why I was relying on school to introduce me to new friends. It is taking long than expected, though. It’s 6 months into the school year, and I just had my first Mommy Date. I’m definitely behind.
But I haven’t lost hope yet. I had a great time on my date today, and I have confidence we will attempt to do it again. We’ll stick with lunch most likely, but maybe after a few lunch dates, we can make it more official with dinner and a movie. Fingers crossed!